Baldy Read online

  "Well, we can always postpone publication." Burkhalter threw out the suggestion casually, and was pleased when Quayle didn't nibble. He didn't like to fail, either.

  "No. No, I want to get the thing done now."

  "Mental catharsis--"

  "Well, by a psychologist, perhaps. But not by--"

  "--a Baldy. You know that a lot of psychologists have Baldy helpers. They get good results, too."

  Quayle turned on the tobacco smoke, inhaling slowly. "I suppose... I've not had much contact with Baldies. Or too much-without selectivity. I saw some in an asylum once. I'm not being offensive, am I?"

  "No," Burbhalter said. "Every mutation can run too close to the line. There were lots of failures. The hard radiations brought about one true mutation: hairless telepaths, but they didn't all hew true to the line. The mind's a queer gadget--you know that. It's a colloid balancing, figuratively, on the point of a pin. If there's any flaw, telepathy's apt to bring it out. So you'll find that the Blowup caused a hell of a lot of insanity. Not only among the Baldies, but among the other mutations that developed then. Except that the Baldies are almost always paranoidal."

  "And dementia praecox," Quayle said, finding relief from his own embarrassment in turning the spotlight on Burkhalter.

  "And d. p. Yeah. When a confused mind acquires the telepathic instinct--a hereditary bollixed mind--it can't handle it all. There's disorientation. The paranoia group retreat into their own private worlds, and the d. p.'s simply don't realize that this world exists. There are distinctions, but I think that's a valid basis."

  "In a way," Quayle said, "it's frightening. I can't think of any historical parallel."

  "No."

  "What do you think the end of it will be?"

  "I don't know," Burkhalter said thoughtfully. "I think we'll be assimilated. There hasn't been enough time yet. We're specialized in a certain way, and we're useful in certain jobs."

  "If you're satisfied to stay there. The Baldies who won't wear wigs--"

  "They're so bad-tempered I expect they'll all be killed off in duels eventually," Burkhalter smiled. "No great loss. The rest of us, we're getting what we want acceptance. We don't have horns or halos."

  Quayle shook his head. "I'm glad, I think, that I'm not a telepath. The mind's mysterious enough anyway, without new doors opening. Thanks for letting me talk. I think I've got part of it talked out, anyway. Shall we try the script again?"

  "Sure," Burkhalter said, and again the procession of pages nickered on the screen above them. Quayle did seem less guarded; his thoughts were more lucid, and Burkhalter was able to get at the true meaning of many of the hitherto muddy statements. They worked easily, the telepath dictating re-phrasings into his dictograph, and only twice did they have to hurdle emotional tangles. At noon they knocked off, and Burkhalter, with a friendly nod, took the dropper to his office, where he found some calls listed on the visor. He ran off repeats, and a worried look crept into his blue eyes.

  He talked with Dr. Moon in a booth at luncheon. The conversation lasted so long that only the induction cups kept the coffee hot, but Burkhalter had more than one problem to discuss. And he'd known Moon for a long time. The fat man was one of the few who were not, he thought, subconsciously repelled by the fact that Burkhalter was a Baldy.

  "I've never fought a duel in my life, Doc. I can't afford to."

  "You can't afford not to. You can't turn down the challenge, Ed. It isn't done."

  "But this fellow Reilly--I don't even know him."

  "I know of him," Moon said. "He's got a bad temper. Dueled a lot."

  Burkhalter slammed his hand down on the table. "It's ridiculous. I won't do it!"

  "Well," Moon said practically, "Your wife can't fight him. And if Ethel's been reading Mrs. Reilly's mind arid gossiping, Reilly's got a case."

  "Don't you think we know the dangers of that?" Burkhalter asked in a low voice. "Ethel doesn't go around reading minds any more than I do. It'd be fatal-for us. And for any other Baldy."

  "Not the hairless ones. The ones who won't wear wigs. They--"

  "They're fools. And they're giving all the Baldies a bad name. Point one, Ethel doesn't read minds; she didn't read Mrs. Reilly's. Point two, she doesn't gossip."

  "La Reilly is obviously an hysterical type," Moon said. "Word got around about this scandal, whatever it was, and Mrs. Reilly remembered she'd seen Ethel lately. She's the type who needs a scapegoat anyway. I rather imagine she let word drop herself, and had to cover up so her husband wouldn't blame her."

  "I'm not going to accept Reilly's challenge," Burkhalter said doggedly.

  "You'll have to."

  "Listen, Doc, maybe--"

  "What?"

  "Nothing. An idea. It might work. Forget about that; I think I've got the right answer. It's the only one, anyway. I can't afford a duel and that's flat."

  "You're not a coward."

  "There's one thing Baldies are afraid of," Burkhalter said, "and that's public opinion. I happen to know I'd kill Reilly. That's the reason why I've never dueled in my life."

  Moon drank coffee. "Hm-m-m. I think--"

  "Don't. There was something else. I'm wondering if I ought to send Al off to a special school."

  "What's wrong with the kid?"

  "He's turning out to be a beautiful delinquent. His teacher called me this morning. The playback was something to hear. He's talking funny and acting funny. Playing nasty little tricks on his friends--if he has any left by now."

  "All kids are cruel."

  "Kids don't know what cruelty means. That's why they're cruel; they lack empathy. But Al's getting--" Burkhalter gestured helplessly. "He's turning into a young tyrant. He doesn't seem to give a care about anything, according to his teacher."

  "That's not too abnormal, so far."

  "That's not the worst. He's become very egotistical. Too much so. I don't want him to turn into one of the wigless Baldies you were mentioning." Buckhalter didn't mention the other possibility; paranoia, insanity.

  "He must pick things up somewhere. At home? Scarcely, Ed. Where else does he go?"

  "The usual places. He's got a normal environment."

  "I should think," Moon said, "that a Baldy would have unusual opportunities in training a youngster. The mental rapport-eh?"

  "Yeah. But--I don't know. The trouble is," Burkhalter said almost inaudibly, "I wish to God I wasn't different. We didn't ask to be telepaths. Maybe it's all very wonderful in the long run, but I'm one person, and I've got my own microcosm. People who deal in long-term sociology are apt to forget that. They can figure out the answers, but it's every individual man-or Baldy-who's got to fight his own personal battle while he's alive. And it isn't as clearcut as a battle. It's worse; it's the necessity of watching yourself every second, of fitting yourself into a world that doesn't want you."

  Moon looked uncomfortable. "Are you being a little sorry for yourself, Ed?"

  Burkhalter shook himself. "I am, Doc. But I'll work it out."

  "We both will," Moon said, but Burkhalter didn't really expect much help from him. Moon would be willing, but it was horribly difficult for an ordinary man to conceive that a Baldy was--the same. It was the difference that men looked for, and found.

  Anyway, he'd have to settle matters before he saw Ethel again. He could easily conceal the knowledge, but she would recognize a mental barrier and wonder. Their marriage had been the more ideal because of the additional rapport, something that compensated for an inevitable, half-sensed estrangement from the rest of the world.

  "How's Psychohistory going?" Moon asked after a while.

  "Better than I expected. I've got a new angle on Quayle. If I talk about myself, that seems to draw him out. It gives him enough confidence to let him open his mind to me. We may have those first chapters ready for Oldfield, in spite of everything."

  "Good. Just the same, he can't rush us. If we've got to shoot out books that fast, we might as well go back to the days of semantic confusion. Which w
e won't!"

  "Well," Burkhalter said, getting up, "I'll smoosh along. See you."

  "About Reilly--"

  "Let it lay." Burkhalter went out, heading for the address his visor had listed. He touched the dagger at his belt. Dueling wouldn't do for Baldies, but--

  A greeting thought crept into his mind, and, under the arch that led into the campus, he paused to grin at Sam Shane, a New Orleans area Baldy who affected a wig of flaming red. They didn't bother to talk.

  Personal question, involving mental, moral and physical well-being.

  A satisfied glow. And you, Burkhalter? For an instant Burkhalter half-saw what the symbol of his name meant to Shane.

  Shadow of trouble.

  A warm, willing anxiousness to help. There was a bond between Baldies.

  Burkhalter thought: But everywhere I'd go there'd be the same suspicion. We're freaks.

  More so elsewhere, Shane thought. There are a lot of us in Modoc Town. People are invariably more suspicious where they're not in daily contact with--Us.

  The boy-I've trouble too, Shane thought. It's worried me. My two girls--

  Delinquency?

  Yes.

  Common denominators?

  Don't know. More than one of Us have had the same trouble with our kids.

  Secondary characteristic of the mutation? Second generation emergence?

  Doubtful, Shane thought, scowling in his mind, shading his concept with a wavering question. We'll think it over later. Must go.

  Burkhalter sighed and went on his way. The houses were strung out around the central industry of Modoc, and he cut through a park toward his destination. It was a sprawling curved building, but it wasn't inhabited, so Burkhalter filed Reilly for future reference, and, with a glance at his timer, angled over a hillside toward the school. As he expected, it was recreation time, and he spotted Al lounging under a tree, some distance from his companions, who were involved in a pleasantly murderous game of Blowup.

  He sent his thought ahead.

  The Green Man had almost reached the top of the mountain. The hairy gnomes were pelting on his trail, most unfairly shooting sizzling light-streaks at their quarry, but the Green Man was agile enough to dodge. The rocks were leaning--

  "Al."

  --inward, pushed by the gnomes, ready to--

  "Al!" Burkhalter sent his thought with the word, jolting into the boy's mind, a trick he very seldom employed, since youth was practically defenseless against such invasion.

  "Hello, Dad," Al said, undisturbed. "What's up?"

  "A report from your teacher."

  "I didn't do anything."

  "She told me what it was. Listen, kid. Don't start getting any funny ideas in your head."

  "I'm not."

  "Do you think a Baldy is better or worse than a non--Baldy?"

  Al moved his feet uncomfortably. He didn't answer.

  "Well," Burkhalter said, "the answer is both and neither. And here's why. A Baldy can communicate mentally, but he lives in a world where most people can't."

  "They're dumb," Al opined.

  "Not so dumb, if they're better suited to their world than you are. You might as well say a frog's better than a fish because he's an amphibian." Burkhalter briefly amplified and explained the terms telepathically.

  "Well... oh, I get it, all right."

  "Maybe," Burkhalter said slowly, "what you need is a swift kick in the pants. That thought wasn't so hot. What was it again?"

  Al tried to hide it, blanking out. Burkhalter began to lift the barrier, an easy matter for him, but stopped. Al regarded his father in a most unfilial way--in fact, as a sort of boneless fish. That had been clear.

  "If you're so egotistical," Burkhalter pointed out, "maybe you can see it this way. Do you know why there aren't any Baldies in key positions?"

  "Sure I do," Al said unexpectedly. "They're afraid."

  "Of what, then?"

  "The--" That picture had been very curious, a commingling of something vaguely familiar to Burkhalter. "The non-Baldies."

  "Well, if we took positions where we could take advantage of our telepathic function, non-Baldies would be plenty envious-especially if we were successes. If a Baldy even invented a better mousetrap, plenty of people would say he'd stolen the idea from some non-Baldy's mind. You get the point?"

  "Yes, Dad." But he hadn't. Burkhalter sighed and looked up. He recognized one of Shane's girls on a nearby hillside, sitting alone against a boulder. There were other isolated figures here and there. Far to the east the snowy rampart of the Rockies made an irregular pattern against blue sky.

  "Al," Burkhalter said, "I don't want you to get a chip on your shoulder. This is a pretty swell world, and the people in it are, on the whole, nice people. There's a law of averages. It isn't sensible for us to get too much wealth or power, because that'd militate against us-and we don't need it anyway. Nobody's poor. We find our work, we do it, and we're reasonably happy. We have some advantages non-Baldies don't have; in marriage, for example. Mental intimacy is quite as important as physical. But I don't want you to feel that being a Baldy makes you a god. It doesn't. I can still," he added thoughtfully, "spank it out of you, in case you care to follow out that concept in your mind at the moment."

  Al gulped and beat a hasty retreat. "I'm sorry. I won't do it again."

  "And keep your hair on, too. Don't take your wig off in class. Use the stickum stuff in the bathroom closet."

  "Yes, but... Mr. Venner doesn't wear a wig."

  "Remind me to do some historical research with you on zoot-suiters," Burkhalter said. "Mr. Venner's wiglessness is probably his only virtue, if you consider it one."

  "He makes money."

  "Anybody would, in that general store of his. But people don't buy from him if they can help it, you'll notice. That's what I mean by a chip on your shoulder. He's got one. There are Baldies like Venner, Al, but you might, sometime, ask the guy if he's happy. For your information, I am. More than Venner, anyway. Catch?"

  "Yes, Dad." Al seemed submissive, but it was merely that. Burkhalter, still troubled, nodded and walked away. As he passed near the Shane girl's boulder he caught a scrap: --at the summit of the Glass Mountains, rolling rocks back at the gnomes until--

  He withdrew; it was an unconscious habit, touching minds that were sensitive, but with children it was definitely unfair. With adult Baldies it was simply the instinctive gesture of tipping your hat; one answered or one didn't. The barrier could be erected; there could be a blank-out; or there could be the direct snub of concentration on a single thought, private and not to be intruded on.

  A copter with a string of gliders was coming in from the south: a freighter laden with frozen foods from South America, to judge by the markings. Burkhalter made a note to pick up an Argentine steak. He'd got a new recipe he wanted to try out, a charcoal broil with barbecue sauce, a welcome change from the short-wave cooked meats they'd been having for a week. Tomatoes, chile, mmm-what else? Oh, yes. The duel with Reilly. Burkhalter absently touched his dagger's hilt and made a small, mocking sound in his throat. Perhaps he was innately a pacifist. It was rather difficult to think of a duel seriously, even though everyone else did, when the details of a barbecue dinner were prosaic in his mind.

  So it went. The tides of civilization rolled in century-long waves across the continents, and each particular wave, though conscious of its participation in the tide, nevertheless was more preoccupied with dinner. And, unless you happened to be a thousand feet tall, had the brain of a god and a god's life-span, what was the difference? People missed a lot-- people like Venner, who was certainly a crank, not batty enough to qualify for the asylum, but certainly a potential paranoid type. The man's refusal to wear a wig labeled him as an individualist, but as an exhibitionist, too. If he didn't feel ashamed of his hairlessness, why should he bother to flaunt it? Besides, the man had a bad temper, and if people kicked him around, he asked for it by starting the kicking himself.

  But as for Al, the kid
was heading for something approaching delinquency. It couldn't be the normal development of childhood, Burkhalter thought. He didn't pretend to be an expert, but he was still young enough to remember his own formative years, and he had had more handicaps than Al had now; in those days, Baldies had been very new and very freakish. There'd been more than one movement to isolate, sterilize, or even exterminate the mutations.

  Burkhalter sighed. If he had been born before the Blowup, it might have been different. Impossible to say. One could read history, but one couldn't live it. In the future, perhaps, there might be telepathic libraries in which that would be possible. So many opportunities, in fact--and so few that the world was ready to accept as yet. Eventually Baldies would not be regarded as freaks, and by that time real progress would be possible.

  But people don't make history--Burkhalter thought. Peoples do that. Not the individual.

  He stopped by Reilly's house, and this time the man answered, a burly, freckled, squint-eyed fellow with immense hands and, Burkhalter noted, fine muscular coordination. He rested those hands on the Dutch door and nodded.

  "Who're you, mister?"

  "My name's Burkhalter."

  Comprehension and wariness leaped into Reilly's eyes. "Oh, I see. You got my call?"

  "I did," Burkhalter said. "I want to talk to you about it May I come in?"

  "O.K." He stepped back, opening the way through a hall and into a spacious living room, where diffused light filtered through glassy mosaic walls. "Want to set the time?"

  "I want to tell you you're wrong."

  "Now wait a minute," Reilly said, patting the air. "My wife's out now, but she gave me the straight of it. I don't like this business of sneaking into a man's mind; it's crooked. You should have told your wife to mind her business--or keep her tongue quiet."

  Burkhalter said patiently, "I give you my word, Reilly, that Ethel didn't read your wife's mind."

  "Does she say so?"

  "I... well, I haven't asked her."

  "Yeah," Reilly said with an air of triumph.

  "I don't need to. I know her well enough. And... well, I'm a Baldy myself."

  "I know you are," Reilly said. "For all I know, you may be reading my mind now." He hesitated. "Get out of my house. I like my privacy. We'll meet at dawn tomorrow, if that's satisfactory with you. Now get out." He seemed to have something on his mind, some ancient memory, perhaps, that he didn't wish exposed.